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Jeddore Premium Flow

by Humpasaur Jones

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lyrics

party people in the place put your hands in the air
leave your drinks on the stage and your pants over there
all the ladies in the house, put your hands in my hair
and your feet on my chest as we stand on this chair
party people in the place...now is the time
to get into the groove and straight out of your mind
party people blah BLAH blah, gather round the rapper now
mushrooms are kicking in, had about a half an ounce
cold killing it, tracking down a classic sound
your girls a problem, though, tragic how she’s acting out
used to love to party, I did a one eighty
the way I see these young ladies getting drunk lately
ridiculous, man...I’m all about drinking, but damn,
she’s having a seizure and pissing her pants
I’m not calling it wrong, I understand it, but dude,
I am calling her Mom and an ambulance too
the dopest at it...been flowing total madness
from broken prophylactic to floating open casket
the show is classic...all photographic flashes
closing act is asking “we’re going after THAT shit?”
...drunk and stoned and then conduct the whole symphony
I’m slick enough to switch it up without switching beats
I’m big enough to listen up when my critics speak
I see your point but I just see it kinda different, see?
skinny jeans, shitty beats, rap show misery
promoter said it’s not an open bar, it is for me
the venue says we’re starting late, I kinda disagree-
it’s bad enough you motherfuckers give MCs chicken feed

flow whiter than most, a ghostwriter for pros
but won’t bite for the dough, I’m nice and I know it
nine dimensional, certified live professional
hired spectacle, fist fighting with poets
live life in the moment, spit twice as devoted
as the average rapper whiz kid biting for bonus points
...wait a minute, hold this joint, light or roach it
but this is my world and I don’t like where it’s going...

...I don’t know much I don’t already know lately
I been to the future and the past looked crazy
walk onstage and get paid like a late fee
suckers say I’m simple but they never say they hate me

nerd rap if I need to, Christian rapper for money,
backpacking and cheap food, I did travel the country
work back in the green room, spit ragged and rusty
last act was complete proof that shitty actors are funny
...lost the locals, they don’t love me no more
but see I’m here to start a riot just cuz fuck it, I’m bored
dude, dudes dumber than you have done it before
and see you’re dumber than me, so trust in the force
but stop talking to me, I do not want to emcee
problem is, I’ve always got God watching me breathe
it’s costing me sleep .. went to talk to a priest
but see I recognized his face now he’s rotting in peace
and your mom is a freak for DJ Squid’s chocolate beats
he’s in her spot as we speak...shot a dot com on her sheets
watch it and weep, another hot, erotic EP
my name is hump jones, proud vermonter and freak
YO HUMP JONES...yeah, I’m listening man
cuz I don’t really have a life, I just live for my fans
YO HUMP JONES...shit yeah that’s me
getting paid to black out on big badass beats

shout outs to the rich kids who bow down to their privelege
the perks in the package, the townhouse in the village
big ups to the waitstaff, tip cups and name tags
doctor gonzo shots, fist up, straight back
shout out to reporters, you’re prostitutes and liars
except for maybe 4 of you and all of them got fired
big ups to the cops in the back of the club
dude, I know you’re not a dick...you’re just acting like one
because you’re dressing like one, that shit gets your head
and yeah I guess what I said could probably get me arrested
shouts to the bartenders...this drink is a joke
it’s like I paid eight bucks for you to piss in my throat
big ups to the sound guy...for sucking at life
I know, adjusting it right is really tough with one mic

….
put your hands in the air if your parents are scared
and just move ‘em around if you’re in tune with the crowd
go drink a pitcher or three until you’re hitting your knees
then buy a shot for the bar and try to walk to your car like
YO HUMP JONES...yeah, I’m listening baby
cuz I care, even if you don’t really give a shit lately
YO HUMP JONES...shit yeah that’s me
getting paid to black out on big badass beats

nobody ever quits rapping, they just quit drugs
and I can’t quit drugs unless I quit rapping, shit sucks
nobody ever gets a verse from a clever nerd that
tries to measure up to master rappers that you never heard of
nobody’s gonna see another weak drunk emcee
who cannot compete, compare or come and fuck with me
and nobody’s gonna need another MP3
for a steady week while this friendly message gets repeated

credits

released November 16, 2011
Mixed + Mastered by Custom for Sounds Custom
Beat by DJ Squid

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Humpasaur Jones Vermont

The rawest, the dumbest, the most articulated and the least authentic. All bars, zero tolerance.

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