(don't touch yourself there, you should have a girlfriend,
what's wrong with you?, look, let's be realistic, here,
God is watching you, you can't say that, the meek shall inherit the Earth
face it, you have a drug problem, this is going on your permanent record,
make it easy on yourself, just cooperate
give us some names, recess is over, everyone get in line, line up straight)

so right that it's wrong, another Humpasaur song
everybody stand back, cuz I'm about to get it on:
it's mister right with a slight twist of different dysfunctions
he lives on leftovers, great for chicks with a budget
twisted and blunted, ripped, stoned and probably drunk
MC Huge Hefner with some quality funk
plus a bike to pop in your trunk, assume it's a joke
but what I do at a show, I can reproduce in your home
this is dedicated to the ladies with the nipple rings
this is going out to housewives trying different things
all the freaky couples with the toys and props
and the servants of Satan, who made a choice to ROCK (YES!!!!)

(hell is a lake of fire where you will burn eternally, this is your brain on drugs,
you should be ashamed of yourself, what would your mother think
don't talk to strangers, LSD is grrreat, get a job)
(wake up, this report card is terrible,
why do you always do this?, is there something wrong with you?
you sit there and you think about what you did
that is the dumbest thing I have ever heard,
you just don't measure up, dude)

last night I drove to Hollywood shot some Paparazzi
and the cops just watched me, then bought me a dollar coffee
I drove back, wrote and recorded this whole track
woke up with no cash, smoked the last bowlpack, shucks
still moving, though, sleeping at the studio
apparently, I'm just too fuckin' arrogant to do a show
put the cash in my hand, I pass that to the band
and we'll serve you more fury than your ass can withstand
fresh flows with pepper, and pesto bruschetta
with some honey pork roast from the Humpasaur Jones
making you nervous, and this is just a statement of purpose
from the world's most insanely perverted catering service

(don't touch it, no, don't touch it, that's bad, don't touch it there
stop touching it, oh, you are in trouble, no touching, stop touching it there
that is very bad)